The Walls Go Back Up
Posted on 2003-01-24
This is precisely the reason why I don't let people get too close.
This is why I don't let people in. It gives them power, something that can be used as ammunition against me in my weaker moments.
I knew better, of course I knew better; I've been taught this lesson before by someone different.
Maybe I just don't learn??? Maybe I wish it was different, or rather maybe I wish I were different??? But I'm not, I'm just me, and today I feel like that's not good enough for him. Then again maybe I'm a little too much to handle, who knows???
I used to be so 'detatched', but I never wanted to be that way with him, so I let the walls I built around me crumble bit by bit and I told him. I told him I felt vulnerable. I told him I felt scared. I told him all of it.
Now I'm just hurt.....