Making Progress
Posted on 2003-09-17
Things have been touch and go at Mums work since the problems with her boss earlier this year, but it looks as though she is finally going to be made redundant within the next couple of weeks.
The company is losing money left, right and center, and the office staff have been told not to go into work until Monday. There's a finance meeting this Friday, and Mum has been told the outcome will determine whether her and her colleagues keep their jobs.
It couldn't have come at a worse time for any of the people Mum works with - one lady is pregnant, another only got married two weeks ago and as for us, well Mum has just taken another bank loan to try and pay off the last one.
Obviously she is now worried that we aren't going to be able to keep up the repayments if she loses her job. It's difficult enough at the moment with her only working part time so that she can care for me, and of course me being me just feels guilty. If I were able to help her more I would do, but living on benefits means I don't have much to give.
Kate keeps telling me that I shouldn't feel as though I'm to blame for everything that happens to me and people around me, but I can't help the way I feel.
On a good note though in this weeks session Kate said that I'm 'making progress', whatever that means. I'm beginning to be able to talk about Geoffs actual death now, but it's still hard to talk about him and our past. My Dad is another area that I can't face just yet, but Kate is hopeful and reckons that it will only be a matter of time.
I'm glad there are people that believe in me, because at times I still find it hard to believe in myself.