Strange Feeling
Posted on 2003-01-15
I've been in a strange mood all day today. I'm not angry..... I'm not sad.....I'm not fed up..... It's hard to explain really. M.E wise I'm not having a very good day. I can't stop shaking all the time, I feel dizzy and faint, I'm having difficulty breathing and the heart palpitations are back. I don't really know whats caused this to happen as I've been taking it easy the last few weeks. I do think that I can put a lot of my strange mood down to the fact that tomorrow is 'T' day though, (therapy day to those of you who don't know me that well).
Kathy (the psychologist) is a lovely lady, or rather she seemed lovely the first time that I met her, but then we hadn't really started talking about what kind of therapy she is going to be giving me.
I always seem to get this strange feeling of dread before I have to go to the hospital or to the doctors, as I never really know what to expect. It's even worse on the actual day. I get that horrible butterflies feeling in my stomach and nine times out of ten I feel sick because I'm so worried. I should be used to going after two years worth of visits, but like the big wimp that I am I haven't, and I don't think I ever will.
Well I guess I should call it a night. For once I have to get some proper sleep otherwise I'll feel even more ill tomorrow than I do today. Ho Hum!