For Mum
Posted on 2003-03-15
Health wise today hasn't been such a good day for me.
In total I've fainted four times, the last time banging my head on the arm of the sofa as I fell, so now on top of everything else I have an amazing headache. It's because of this that I haven't done a great deal today - I'm afraid to get out of bed again because as soon as I stand up I get really dizzy and light headed. Part of me is wondering if it's the diet my doctors have put me on. I'm still losing weight and am even paler than my usual ghostly white, but on the other hand it could just as easily be something to do with my blood pressure or my heart. I hate this damn illness at times. Why can't there just be a simple, straight forward answer for once???
I've finally got my Mums birthday present sorted out, and earlier Mark collected it from Helens for me. I decided to go with the poem idea that Sandy came up with, and as my friend Helen can do calligraphy I got her to write it up on some nice paper, before framing it.
The poem is below for any of you who might be wondering what I came up with. I just hope that she likes it.....
If I could give my Mum the world,
Or anything she wanted,
I'd give her my own heart and soul,
And leave my own heart haunted.
I'd take upon myself her life,
With all its strife and pain,
And let her ease into some space,
Where she could live again.
The pain for me would not be pain,
At least not for a while;
For I'd be doing it for her,
And I would see her smile.
I wish that I could take her heart,
And cleanse it with my tears,
And make her sorrow go away,
And answer all her fears.
I wish, I wish, but then I can't,
As I watch helplessly,
And take her in my arms and say,
I wish that it were me.
But loving is a hard, hard way,
With all the pain it brings.
And yet there is no other way,
To touch the heart of things.
Bits of this might not make sense to you, but it will to her and that's what's important here right???