Untitled Writing
Posted on 2003-03-12
Yesterday completely exhausted me, and unfortunately as my energy levels dropped, so did my mood.
When I looked at my Open University record today via the internet I noticed that they'd added a comment stating that I'm 'disabled'. I have to admit that it made me feel pretty strange seeing it written in black and white like that.
I've always hated the word 'disabled'. It implies that someone is less able to do something than someone else, and I don't agree with that. Ok, things are going to be a lot harder for someone who is physically or mentally challenged in one way or another, but to me that doesn't mean that they are incapable.
I've never thought of myself as being disabled at all, and although I applied for Disabled Students Allowance I was only hoping that I could claim money for taxi's to and from the local library, and maybe transcripts of some of the course cassettes - I never imagined that I'd be offered furniture, software, money and a laptop. Of course I'm extremely grateful, and overwhelmed at the O.U's generosity, but I still don't like that word 'disabled' and I doubt I ever will.
Here's something that I wrote earlier today:
I'm sitting in my room now,
Thinking of all the years,
Thinking of my past,
And crying invisible tears
The tears cannot be seen,
By my family or my friends,
Because I hide behind other emotions,
The wall of protection never ends.
Tears drop down my cheeks,
As I think of all my fears,
I'm slowly melting away,
As I cry invisible tears.
If you can think of a title for this please sign my guestbook and tell me - at the moment this piece of writing seems incomplete.